When You’re Younger Than the People You Manage
Becoming a manager can feel overwhelming, especially when you have older colleagues as direct reports. Here are some tips for managing people who have more work experience than you.
Job and life advice for young professionals. See more from Ascend here.
Hello new manager!
Welcome to the ranks: More than 60% of Millennials and nearly half of Gen Z employees say they are people managers. Before we get into the nitty-gritty, take a moment to bask in your glory. Adding the word “manager” to your title might feel intimidating at first, but you’re here. You did it. Take a beat to celebrate the exhilarating road ahead.
Great.
Now take a deep breath, because, the real work is just beginning. You may be designated as a “manager,” but what you’re really aiming for is to lead your team. What’s the difference? A manager is responsible for delegating tasks and assignments. While this will be one part of your role, the other part will be leading: bringing out the best in people, and inspiring them to do great work, make sound decisions, and work towards a mutual goal.
Among your first challenges will probably be managing and leading someone older than you. How do you engender their trust, respect, and admiration when there’s a five-, or maybe even a 10-year (or more) age difference?
Here are four key strategies you can put into practice:
A common fear of young managers and leaders is: My colleagues won’t take me seriously. You may find that this manifests in many different ways: “I look too young.” “I sound too young.” “Maybe I act too young.” “How will my subordinates ever respect me?”
To get out of your head the next time you have these thoughts, try looking for real-world evidence that supports them. Then, look for evidence that suggests the opposite. Ask yourself: Would I have been promoted into this role if my supervisor, and the company, thought I was incompetent? Probably not. You may find that your colleagues don’t actually attribute competence or high performance to age. (And if they do, that’s ageism and you should probably tell HR or your manager.)
No matter what you find, remind yourself of this often: You belong in the seat you are occupying.
People get picked to be managers because of their talents and people skills. This could be your ability to make sound decisions, bring different people together, influence others, and stay calm during tough moments.
When you start out, engage with your older direct reports in one-on-ones. Talk about your vision and goals for the team. Remember that they come with experience, and their experience can help you refine your ideas. Leave space for two-way dialogue and stay open to feedback.
If you are feeling unsure or insecure while leading, your team will be able to read that energy and may become unsure of your leadership too. That’s why it’s important to practice confidence when speaking to them: Make eye contact, use gestures to accentuate your point, stand up straight, and maintain strong body language. Practicing your delivery method will help you speak with conviction, be clear about your intentions, and show up as the leader you aspire to be.
At the same time, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and relate to your team during challenge projects or conversations. You’re not expected to walk in day one and be an expert. You are, however, expected to be 100% honest — about the challenges your team is facing, the strategies you are contemplating, and your willingness to listen and learn from those around you.
When you share your ideas, leave room for your team to (honestly) reflect on them. Let them know that you value their opinions and experiences. You could say, “This is what I had in mind, and here’s why.…what do you think? Do you agree? Disagree? Is there anything we’re missing here? I’d love your thoughts and feedback.”
Especially when it comes to older direct reports who may have been in the organization for a longer period than you, solicit their opinions on what has worked in the past, what their current working style is, and where things are due for change. Ask how you can best support them. Say, “I know we started this new workflow last month. I wanted to know how you feel about it and take some time to review it.”
When you do that, it’s important to be receptive to their ideas and views. Be transparent about your desire to establish a true partnership. Your goal should be to bring out the best in one another.
Leaders who are generous — with their time, energy, and resources, with sharing credit and giving meaningful feedback — are the ones who earn respect and admiration from their teams. Generosity at its most basic is this: Walking in every day and asking yourself, “How can I make my teams’ lives better or easier?” “What can I do to help them do their jobs successfully?” “How can I be an advocate for their ideas or support their initiatives?” “How can I showcase what they do right and have their back when things go wrong?”
Recognize that your older employees may be at a different life stage than you. Spend time to learn more about them, get a deeper sense of any barriers they may be facing, and how can you try to remove them, or at the very least, be creative in coming up with workarounds or ways to collaborate. For instance, you may find that one employee has to homeschool their kid during work hours. What can you do to support them and make their lives a little easier?
Being empathetic is critical to being a good leader. Do your best to accommodate different needs.
Great leaders, of all ages, show strength and humility, demonstrate a willingness to learn and also an ability to make decisions. Nothing about your age is a pre-determinant of your success as a leader. Rely on your transferable skills, build a solid team, and remember to set stereotypes aside as you venture into your new role as a leader.
When You’re Younger Than the People You Manage
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