A World We Can Feel Good About
Yesterday afternoon, after playing several games of tennis, Dan and I headed back to our car, feeling happy that we were able to spend time together in such a fun way. As we walked off of the courts in the beautiful and secluded park, a grandma and her two grandchildren walked on. We opened our trunk to put the rackets and tube of balls in when I saw the granddaughter — who looked to be about nine years old — look out at us and back at their car, which was parked a few spots away (the only two in the small parking lot). I overheard her ask her grandma if they had locked the car. When the grandma didn’t immediately respond, she asked even louder, with more urgency. The grandma replied that she had set the alarm, and they began their game. And we drove away.
Later in the day, I thought about that little girl and felt sad about all that she’s carrying on her shoulders — all of the worry and the fear. And then I thought about what a different world we live in from when I was a child. Because of technology, kids are so much more connected to the world than I ever could have been while growing up. We didn’t have cell phones or the internet or 24/7 TV. I lived in a bubble much of the time and was protected from violence as much as possible. While I knew to be aware of strangers, I certainly didn’t fear them. And while I knew that bad things sometimes happened in the world, I wasn’t inundated with examples of it, so it wasn’t a part of my daily life.
Because they are so connected, kids today are bombarded with scary stories of terrorism and the possibility of nuclear war and political upheaval and can feel anger from every direction. They truly live in a different world than the one I knew as a child. And while I know that we can never go back in time, I still found myself wishing that we could.
Last week, we went to see Won’t You Be My Neighbor, a documentary about Mr. Rogers and his TV show. So when I saw this little girl at the tennis courts and felt her fear, this movie and all that I had taken into my consciousness while watching it was still swirling around in my brain. Words like kindness and tolerance and acceptance and silence and slowness and creativity and make believe and authenticity and love were still at the forefront of my mind — words and ideas that Mr. Rogers embodied so beautifully. Words that seemed so far away in so many ways from where our world was heading.
While watching the movie, I felt a mix of nostalgia, sadness, gratitude, and hope. From the moment that Mr. Rogers appeared on the screen, a sense of calm washed over me — similar to how I felt as a child when I would curl up with my blanket in front of the TV to enter the land of make believe and see what King Friday and all of my puppet friends were up to. Upon leaving the theater, Dan and I sat in the car together, in silence. We gave ourselves time to process what we had just watched. And when we got home, we still couldn’t find words to express the enormity of it all. And, to be honest, I’m still having a hard time conveying how I’ve shifted since seeing this powerful film — how it’s helped to bring me home again in a way that I needed more than I had even realized.
And while I’m sure that many more layers will unfold as I continue to digest it all, what I can say now is that my wish is that we can all live in the world — that we can all create the world — that Mr. Rogers envisioned. A world where we welcome and accept each other, just as we are. A world where we express our feelings and feel seen and understood. A world where slow and steady are embraced. A world where we feel safe. A world where the possibilities truly are limitless. A world where love far outweighs anything else.
That’s the world that I want to live in. That’s the world that I want this little girl to live in. A world where she can play tennis with her grandma and not worry about her safety…not worry about anything.
Yes. I realize that this may seem idealistic. And, yes, I also realize that it may seem too simplistic. And I’m okay with that. Because I’m a huge fan of doing what makes me feel good…or at least better. I’ve spent the better part of the past two years feeling disempowered and angry and hopeless due to what I saw happening in our world. And that didn’t feel good at all. Thinking about embodying Mr. Rogers’ world makes my heart feel all warm and fuzzy. And in those moments when I’m there — in that happy place — everything seems to make sense again. So I’ll continue to go there. And I hope that others will spend time in this place, too. Because I believe that in doing so, our world will begin to shift and change into the world that so many of us could be proud to be part of. Not just for us, but for many generations to come.
Originally published at www.dandisoul.com on July 24, 2018.
A World We Can Feel Good About
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