Passion as a Privilege
We live in a world shaped by people who are passionate about what they do. They strive to build their knowledge and skills to a point where they can make a difference. They love what they do so much that they reach the edge of what there is to know in a field, then push that little more until they create new advances in the area or shed new perspectives on existing knowledge. Either way, these people change things. They have passion. They have drive. They have intuition and bravery to strive towards something new; some bigger goal that underpins the philosophy of their approach.
Many of us have had passions that we’ve chased until we’ve had to let go of them. Maybe our to a work-life balance didn’t allow for it. Maybe we’ve prioritised one thing over the others so that it becomes an engaging livelihood. Everyone has passions, or at least, isn’t that what we’re told?
I’m using ‘passion’ here in an overly simplistic sense. A drive, a push towards becoming accomplished in a field or activity despite setbacks. This isn’t romantic or social passion, but passion in exploits. And yes, by privilege, I mean it in the typical sociological sense: An aspect of your life that you did not ask for nor gain through hard work that benefits you.
I have known many passionate people throughout my short life so far. I have met so many well-practised and highly achieving artists, writers, doctors, researchers, lawyers, humanitarians, and I keep wanting to work out what makes them so passionate about what they do. What drives them to keep on highly attaining in what their respective area? Much of the time, I get a response like a simple “it’s what I enjoy,” or a more complex “for the betterment of humanity via X, Y, and Z”. If they feel reflective on their past, I may hear about a life experience they had which changed their outlook; often something specific in their upbringing which one would not be able to replicate.
Humans are creatures of habit who learn these habits from the world around them. If exposed to the daily minutiae of a successful person, we can recognise the little things they do that we can apply to our own lives; how often do they read? How do they structure their day? How do they rest and recharge while maintaining a successful work-life balance? We pick these up, and even if our own passion somewhat differs, we find ways to adapt these patterns to suit our own lives, even without realising. Our intuition becomes moulded by their intuition.
Of course, passionate parents do not always beget passionate children and passionate people can arise from the most adverse of circumstances. However, it is hard to deny that there is a trend. ‘The apple does not fall far from the tree’ became a popular proverb for a reason.
Talent is one of those societal myths which just won’t die. Nobody is born with an innate skill. Labelling a well-practised person as talented undermines their effort. It also signals to others that this level of skill can only be reached if you’re ‘born with it’. Being raised to believe in inherent attributes such as ‘intelligence’, ‘beauty’, and ‘talent’ is damaging in the long run, and is a hard pattern of thought to shake off.
I do not blame my parents for how I was raised; they tried their best on the information and experiences they have had. In fact, I have a lot to thank them for. But there was always something I was uncomfortable with at the back of my mind.
My dad tells me he had a passion when he was younger. He wanted to go to university and study geology. His father is a successful engineer and wanted his sons to do the same. My dad ended up joining the military under the guise of using that and an in-road to engineering. After he finished his service, picked up a career that he does well in, but not one that most people would pick given a choice.
My mum got impressively far in a career which these days would need a lot of vigorous academic and vocational training. In those days it mostly required vocational, on-the-job learning. She’s never been into reading since I have known her. My interest in books was initially because I wasn’t a sociable kid, and we lived in a village a while away from a small city where nothing happened anyway. They weren’t particularly sociable or outgoing either.
From what I remember of my childhood, evenings and weekends were spent in front of the TV. My parents would come in from work and the TV would go on. Nothing was watched in particular; the channels were searched until they found something watchable. For a while, I would escape to my room when the TV went on to read, to work, or to do anything else but watch inane house hunting shows, soap operas, reality shows, ad nauseum.
After I while I was complained at for leaving because I wasn’t ‘being sociable’. Though unintentional, this puts across the message that free time should be used to distract yourself. They supported me where they could, but at one point they even tried to discourage me from going into academia because they knew nothing of that world, and it scared them.
However, as my friends and family can testify, I’ve overcompensated for this. I have so much ‘alive’ time that it’s making me less alive. Trying to maximise my productivity and time with loved ones has lead to me burning myself out on multiple occasions. With no role model, no mentorship surrounding handling academia healthily or being a freelance creative, I’ve handled it with definite trial and error, to my detriment. Teaching yourself passion responsibly is difficult.
We hear, from antiquity to the modern day, stories of people raising their kids to learn the family trade. By the time they reach adulthood, these children are skilled in the field, learning almost from birth how to navigate the field and build the necessary skills to succeed. Though the world has mostly changed, this is still alive and kicking in some regards.
A doctor is generally in an excellent position to explain to someone how they became a doctor, the mistakes they made, and how they overcame them. As such, their child is in a prime position to enter the medical training system, as they have a guide for the entire journey.
Jean was a seemingly happy-go-lucky Frenchman, a fellow student in my degree programme. He always seemed so excited, so engaged. Whatever you were working on, he loved to know, and would always find an angle of discussion, even if he had no direct experience in the area. One day, he showed me a photo on his phone.
A family friend had printed off the title, author list and abstract of his first scientific publication, and put it into a frame next to the title, author list, and abstract of his father’s first publication from 20 years before. Then it made more sense. His father turned out to be an overly sociable academic, and growing up, there were always academics from some field or other hanging out in his parents’ house. He was surrounded by the energy that would impassion him and boost him upwards.
Molly was an incredible musician. From a young age, she was a multi-instrumental prodigy. Learning musical instruments is good for the mind, and is found to improve learning in other parts of one’s life. This was clear from how she went from never having driven to passing her driving test in the space of a month and a half during a study period before exams and just before trying out for the national orchestra.
She went on to study at one of the world’s best conservatories. Her parents were both trained musicians too. I heard fairly regularly about how her parents gave her new ways to overcome struggling to learn new instruments or more complex techniques. They helped her build her passionate livelihood. They also had the financial means and the priority to bolster her passion.
Then there was Daniel. He’d grown up in the rural outskirts of a large city in the US Midwest. His parents were, in his own words, “loving rednecks”. I met them once. They seemed like kind people, but with little awareness of the greater world. However, he could get on his bike, and during his summers while in high school, he’d cycle to the nearby university, where he’d do research.
This eventually netted him a summer studentship and later a place in the PhD programme at one of the best universities in the world. While his parents weren’t passionate people, he had easy access to people who were and facilities to help him pursue his passion.
So what do these people have in common? They have easy access to Passionates; either in their home or not far from it, guiding them to build their passion, skills and knowledge in a healthy, manageable, and efficient way.
Small children are curious, inquisitive, ready to learn; some children have this nurtured until it blooms and bears incredible fruit. For others, this feeling is neglected or actively suppressed. Most school systems are not prepared to foster passion, only to enforce learning for tests like a factory system.
There are so many reasons why people from poorer households tend to get stuck in jobs they’re not passionate about that just pay the bills; one of these is lack of mentorship. Their parents can’t guide them in developing a passion, as they never learned themselves, nor do they have the contacts to help. Their parents never had the opportunities themselves for the same reason, as well as being limited by their financial situation. People from less affluent backgrounds commonly start working earlier. This leaves them less leisure time, which could be spent learning skills and building passions.
To those of you who are highly driven, passionate people, you are amazing. You can reach great heights and do great things. We from less passionate beginnings appreciate you in our lives, and your abilities are really admirable. But can you imagine not having that drive? Or that drive becoming so all-consuming that it begins to destroy you?
Despite how my writing may come across, I have no resentment or jealousy regarding passionate people. Far from it. By making friends fuelled by a variety of passions, it helps me grow, it helps me guide my late-blooming passion. It can be difficult to break out of cycles of you’ve grown up with. By keeping passionate, encouraging people close, the gradual and radical positive changes become so much easier than going at it alone.
Passion as a Privilege
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