Severe Health Anxiety
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2 posts since
7 Jul 2020
Hi Folks,
I’m a 42 year old guy from Liverpool and for the last 4 or 5 years I’ve suffered from severe health anxiety to the point of it takes over my life.
Previously I’ve convinced myself I’ve had a brain tumour, lung cancer, lymphoma and now my latest one is bowel cancer.
For around 9 days now I’ve had stomach cramps that have come in waves, not to the point of doubled up in pain, but just to the point of feeling uncomfortable. Without being too crude, I feel like I need to go the loo to open my bowels but after going I still feel relatively full.
I haven’t lost weight, my stools are not raising any flags and other than the stomach cramps there is absolutely no indicators that would suggest stomach cancer.
But there lies the problem, so bad is my anxiety that I’m constantly searching the internet for symptoms, seeking reassurance and basically convincing myself I’ve got it.
Such is the level of anxiety, I’ve phoned NHS 111 twice since Friday, tried every trick in the book to get a doctors appointment, even got a telephone consultation from a doctor who advised buscopan (which actually worked until they run out) and as a last resort considered presenting myself to A&E.
Its got to the point now where I feel guilt by wasting the resources of the NHS, and the logical side of me knows full well its nothing serious, but the anxiety is such a powerful thing all rational thoughts go out the window.
In a way its a vicious circle, I’ve had a really traumatic 14 months, I lost my mum suddenly to a stroke (she was only 69), I had to apply for and buy the house I lived in (it was a council house), I had to learn to run a house, grieve for my mum, pay bills, get a mortage. Then, over Christmas my good friend disappeared and ultimately took his own life so its literally been one thing after another with Covid as well. Naturally stress makes your stomach bad and thinking about your stomach gives you stress so you can see how this is going.
Pre-lockdown I did try cognitive therapy but it didn’t do anything, it was part of a group and I stupidly put my guard up and acted all manly and tough.
A doctor once had a long chat with me in December 2018, he was a locum, a young fella similar age to me. We sat and went through all my medical records, he said I’m a fit and healthy man but asked why I thought I would be diagnosed with cancer and I genuinely couldn’t answer, I just have this fear.
Anyone who has health anxiety has my utmost sympathy, your friends and family almost humour you about it, but once it gets into your mind it can be the worst thing in the world.
My apologies to those on here who have actually got cancer, or are in remission, I am sure you don’t want to hear my waffle.
Thanks,
Andy
37 posts since
2 Jul 2020
Hello
im only 25 and in the past 10 months I’ve had health anxiety for the first time and I’m scared that I’ll be like this forever it’s very exhausting mentally and physically! I’m forever searching the Internet for symptoms and then developing them after I’m terrified of getting cancer I’ve convinced myself I’ve had lymphoma aswell and now breast cancer I had nipple discharge and now feel like I have a lump but for weeks I didn’t go to the doctors because I kept thinking it was just in my mind so now I’m even more scared
I’m so sorry to hear about your mum and friend 🙁 I tried cbt one on one and it seemed to really help until this corona virus got serious then it took me back to square one
2 posts since
7 Jul 2020
Thank you Harrysmum, really kind of you to take the time to reply.
As I mentioned in my initial post, I did think twice about posting on here for the fear of upsetting people.
Hope everything works out well for you, take care.
873 posts since
3 Dec 2019
Hi Andy
If you have a look there is a string with people with health anxiety hope you can find it. And good luck.
Billy
4030 posts since
11 May 2016
I’m really sorry to read how much of an impact your healthy anxiety is having on you Andy and for what’s happened over the last 14 months. It sounds like you’ve had a really rough time so do try and be kind to yourself.
Health anxiety can be very physically and emotionally demanding but there are many organisations that can help. I’m not sure if you’ve come across this website already but Anxiety UK have lots of useful information and advice as well as a helpline you can call.
I noticed that you said you once tried group therapy. As you found that didn’t quite work for you, maybe you could look in to one – on – one sessions instead? I know it’s difficult with the pandemic going on but your GP should be able to point you in the right direction. You may want to have a look at the Every Mind Matters section of the NHS website as well.
I hope this helps Andy and that you’re able to get this under control soon.
Kind regards,
Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator
Severe Health Anxiety
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